3. February 2010 by Revelator.

And here it comes once again…Valentine’s Day. That one day a year we must visibly show our undying devotion to and appreciation for the one we love. So, off we go to the corner gas station/convenience store on February 13 looking for the card we almost forgot to purchase to show exactly how much we love our one true love. Finding only a card from a dog to its owner we rush off to Wal-Mart where the selection is only slightly better. But you find a card that sort of fits your current relationship and then you head over to the candy aisle to find that all that is left are $50 boxes of “Anatomically Correct Heart Shaped” Chocolate covered Canteloupe. Sure you love canteloupe - who doesn’t? But you’re put off by its anatomically correct shape so you are off to Target where, much to your chagrin all they have left is a 25 pound Hershey Kiss®. Now what?

Sure, I could go on but most of us guys have been there - done that, so I’ll leave the rest to your unfortunate memories of Valentine’s past. I’ll assume you’ve learned your lessons and now start planning your Valentine’s Day accordingly. Two weeks out you started searching and found the perfect Valentine’s gift for your lady. You were smart and passed on the “Jillian Michaels Biggest Loser Workout” for the Wii and instead opted for the Mani-Pedi-Spa-Massage package. Sure it ran you just over $400 bucks but come on, she’s worth it.

But the question remains - how do you pull this off without her finding out about this great gift ahead of time? You know she loves surprises so you want to make this all happen without her knowing…but how?
How can you make a major purchase ahead of time without her knowing?
How can you make sure she is available on Daytona 500 Sunday..I mean, Valentine’s Day for her appointment at the spa?
How can you make sure she doesn’t just go and waste money on a manicure or a pedicure (or both) on Friday in anticipation of you taking her out to dinner for Valentine’s Day?
And won’t she be suspicious if you haven’t made some sort of plans for Valentine’s Day?
Is some sort of deception plan required?
How can you pull this off and still watch the Great American Race?

All these questions and more can be answered by utilizing OPSEC in your planning. Just common sense and perhaps some deception and you can actually pull off a great Valentine’s Day surprise that will really show the one you love just how much you love them…until next Valentine’s Day when you will have to top this one. Good luck with that.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

HeartBeat (It’s A Love Beat) - The DeFranco Family

Posted in BS, Planning, Family OPSEC | Print | No Comments »

29. December 2009 by Revelator.

As 2009 draws to a close I thought I might ponder, muse if you will, about the state of OPSEC and all that has happened in OPSEC during the year…or I could do the third installment of my running discourse about fortune cookies.

I’ve decided on the fortune cookies…

The day was March 17, 2008 (it’s still there - check it out) - I could no longer hold back and had to do that fateful first Fortune Cookie entry. And it felt good. My basic premise was that Fortune Cookies rarely had fortunes in them. Instead they had statements about living and other such crap. Nine months later (December 5, 2008) I was fed up again and wrote the second in the series about Fortune Cookies. And now, after a stop at Panda Express the other day I am compelled to write the third in my continuing Fortune Cookie Saga…

Look, I’m a basic guy. Keep it simple. When I open a Fortune Cookie I want to see a fortune damn it! I don’t care what it says and I don’t believe a word I read but if you are going to call it a Fortune Cookie then I believe I deserve a fortune - even a weak one. Come on, I know that the McRib isn’t really rib meat - it’s just a great sauce so I’m Ok with almost right but I can’t stand by and be lied to by the Fortune Cookie wrapper itself. If they were called Words of Wisdom and Other Such Crap Cookies then I’m good with them but they are not - they are called Fortune Cookies and (I say again) I want to see a fortune damn it!

Waiting till the end of the meal (as I believe tradition requires) I opened my latest Fortune Cookie and here is what the tiny white paper had printed upon it; “Treat yourself to something of quality.” Now I’m not sure by what standards you may define “fortune” but I’m pretty sure this statement would not qualify. And just so you won’t think this was a one off aberration allow me to share a couple of more “fortunes” with you:

A smile is your personal welcome mat. Not mine - have you seen my teeth lately? A statement - and not true.

A truly rich life contains love and art in abundance. Says who? By the way - I have much love but little to no art in my life so I guess, by definition, I’m screwed out of a truly rich life. Another statement - and false.

Competence like yours is underrated. Know what they call underrated competence? Incompetence - that’s what it’s called when its underrated. Under appreciated is quite another thing. I could live with that. It’s still not a fortune though. Nope, another statement that is not only false but misleading.

Have a beautiful day. Bite me. Not even a true statement but an order. I do not take orders from cookies.

There’s no such thing as an ordinary cat. Logically, it would seem to me that at any given time there is one cat in the world who is smack dab in the middle of cat extremes. This cat then, would have to be the one who is ordinary - until he or she dies leaving the next one who is, again, the one who is in the middle of the extremes and by definition; ordinary.

You are working hard. Not a fortune and certainly not true.

You have a shrewd knack for spotting insincerity. Found it. So I guess that one is true - but still not a fortune, merely a lucky guess.

Truth be told I have received a number of “fortunes” in my Fortune Cookies over the years. Here are what I consider decent fortunes:

Now is a good time to buy stock.
Now is the time to go ahead and pursue that love interest!
You are in good hands this evening.
You will inherit a large sum of money.

See what I’m saying? To my knowledge only one of those came true but again, this is not my point. Truth in advertising - that’s all I’m looking for. When I crack it open I want a fortune damn it!

Happy New Year’s y’all.

Keep the Faith
Revelator

Lies - The Rolling Stones

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24. December 2009 by Revelator.

Alright now settle down, settle down. Everyone take your seats and let’s get this thing started. Plenty of room up front folks…come on down - don’t be shy. That’s right - fill in all the seats. And you guys leaving the extra seat open like you do in the theater…that’s not gonna fly in here; move it on over. Doesn’t mean your dating just cuz your elbows touch. Oh come on! Who’s cell was that? You? Well ain’t you special… Everyone, I would like you to meet that one special person to whom the rules don’t apply. Could a couple of you gentlemen who abided by the rules please escort this gentleman to the door, take his badge and fling him into the new falling snow? Thank you very much. Dutch? Could you make sure to terminate his security clearance please? Thanks.

Boys, this is serious business and you will either follow my rules or….well, you’ve seen what happens when you don’t follow the rules.

Where’s my clicker? Thanks. Slide, the first - here’s your target. Surprised? Wondering just what the hell is going on here? Well, wipe those stunned looks off your faces cuz this is indeed your target and we have a very small window of opportunity to grab this guy and that time is fast approaching.

So your saying to yourself; “I’ve seen this guy a thousand times - I could walk half a block from here and just grab him.” Yes, you could grab him…but it wouldn’t be him. Remember when we found out that Saddam had look-a-likes attending meetings and such in his stead? Well, this guy has taken this strategy to insane new levels. In our estimation he has over 27,000 doubles working all over the world and trust me when I tell you we don’t have the budget to round them all up and run DNA tests on each one so we need to figure out just how to get the real one; something people have been trying to do for long about two hundred years now. Oh, he’s crafty this one - don’t ever underestimate this man.

And here’s the worst thing about this guy - he understands our intelligence systems and how to manipulate those. Wait there is one more thing - he see’s what you are doing. Some how he has each and everyone of you under surveillance 24 hours a day. For example, he knows that you are here now and later he’ll know what you are doing too. It is very hard to track a target like that let me tell you.

Back to the intel systems - he’s on to us. How do we know? Here’s how:

1. We know exactly what he looks like and we can’t find him.
2. We know exactly what he wears and we can’t find him.
3. We know exactly who his wife is but no one has ever actually seen her.
4. We know where he lives but we can’t actually find it.
5. We know exactly what he drives but we can’t find that either.
6. We know exactly when he will be out among us yet we can’t find him.
7. We know is flight routes but still can’t shoot him down.
8. We know who works for him but no one has ever seen one of his employees.

So, we know everything about this guy and yet for all our efforts no one can find him and bring him in. That is why your were brought here. You are the best of the best in your fields and we think if anyone can find this guy it will be someone in this room. Let me add that I think the one mil we’re offering as a reward just might incentivize each of you a bit.

Fellow OPSECers, I was thinking about Santa this morning and I’ve come to the conclusion that Santa must have the best OPSEC program EVER! How else can you explain items 1-8 above? Seriously. Dude has it mastered. Sure, NORAD follows him every year but still no one has been able to shoot him down. I’m just saying…
You find another program that protects info better than this and I’ll put you right at the top of my Christmas List.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

‘Zat You, Santa Claus? - Louis Armstrong (and many others)

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18. December 2009 by Revelator.

This is just unfreakingbelievable!

Hackers steal SKorean-US military secrets By KWANG-TAE KIM, Associated Press Writer Kwang-tae Kim, Associated Press Writer Fri Dec 18, 7:19 am ET

The USB device contained a summary of plans for military operations by South Korean and U.S. troops in case of war on the Korean peninsula. Won said the stolen document was not a full text of the operational plans, but an 11-page file used to brief military officials. He said it did not contain critical information.

Pardon? Did I read that wrong? Let me check…”He said it did not contain critical information.” Nope - I read it right. Still can’t believe it. I mean, are you kidding me? An 11 page Executive Summary of our South Korean defense plans (OPLAN 5027) contains no sensitive information? Am I dead? Did I go to OPSEC hell and not get greeted by the demon of OPSEC? I’ve met this demon before - his name is Ignorance - so I’m pretty sure I would know him if he was greeting me at the gates of OPSEC hell. Perhaps this is a dream? Damn it people - just saying something isn’t so does not make it not so. Sure that’s a horrible sentence but let me show one that is far worse: “He said it did not contain critical information.” See? Much worse.

And don’t give me that nonsense that denying it had critical information is our way of not confirming to the North Koreans that it did indeed contain sensitive information. You know who says stuff like that? People who don’t understand the adversary. To be so blind as to think that North Korea doesn’t have a damn good idea of what is essentially contained in OPLAN 5027 is the height of ignorance. Especially since you can find older versions of OPLAN 5027 in all it’s classified glory on the internet.

I’ll grant that the 11 page summary may have been unclassified but there is no way I’m going to grant it didn’t contain critical information. Unless the only definition you have of critical information is anything that’s classified - and we know that’s just not true. Too bad not everybody understands that these days.

Thanks to my good friend Kirk for letting me know about this.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Tell It Like It Is - Aaron Neville

Posted in Risk, Critical Information, BS, Vulnerabilities, Threat, Media, WWW, Computer Intrusions | Print | No Comments »

17. December 2009 by Revelator.

OPERATIONS SECURITY - OPERATIONS SECURITY - OPERATIONS SECURITY - OPERATIONS SECURITY. Everyone - say it with me now: OPERATIONS SECURITY!

If I read one more article, speech or blog entry that defines OPSEC as Operational Security I’m gonna go Elvis on my computer monitor. People, this isn’t difficult. Operations Security is a different concept than operational security. I’m not gonna go into a long dissertation about the difference because you should know what the difference is. But even as I write those words I realize I’m wrong. Generals, Lt Col’s, Master Sergeants, CIO’s even OPSEC Managers have written, or spoken operational security when speaking of OPSEC. And not just in general but typically something like this: “OPSEC, or Operational Security, is a 5-step…”
I honestly don’t know why this happens or what to do about it - I just know that every time it happens it sets us back just a little bit. OPSEC has a hard enough time getting accepted without people who should know better defining it incorrectly. In the world of OPSEC there is much room for disagreement on a number of topics but this isn’t one of them.
Which comes first; Threat or Critical Information development? Argue that all you want.
How should you define risk? Take sides and come out swinging.
What is the best way to prioritize vulnerabilities? Jump into the octagon and figure it out.
But - “Is it Operations Security or operational security?” is not open to debate.
So, to all of you getting it wrong I say: STOP THAT!

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

All Shook Up - Elvis

Posted in BS, General OPSEC | Print | 1 Comment »

16. October 2009 by Revelator.

As we are all aware by now Operations Security, or OPSEC, has been around for ages. We first see it referred to directly in early Greek texts like this “ασφάλεια διαδικασιών.” Granted most of us don’t read Greek but perhaps this will aid in your understanding: OPSEC has it’s own Greek God - his name is Opus.

Opus was the brother of Calisto. After the overthrow of their Father Vasilios he drew lots with Calisto and four other brothers, for shares of the security world. Opus had the worst draw and was made lord of OPSEC. His wife was Iossa whom Opus abducted from the God Enesay. Opus may be the God of OPSEC but, security itself is another god, Seeiya.

This legend was first spoke of in Greek Mythology as dictated by Ospa; a Greek pre-classical poet and contemporary of Homer. His preliminary epic poems spoke through symbolism with a heavy dose of romanticism though some of his later works dealt directly with mysticism and the duality of God and man. In an early Ospa epic Opus was shown as both God and man as he does battle with the mythical 5-headed purple dragon, Tarasthretenstien. Opus, though expressly told not to seek out and attack Tarasthretenstein, set out one day with the express purpose of doing battle with, and ultimately defeating the dreaded purple dragon. It is written that he ignored the warnings of his father Vasilios as he suited up for battle knowing that as the God of OPSEC his failure would mean the loss of OPSEC to the world. As soon as he was suited up, the sky turned black and the purple dragon descended with each of its five mouths spewing fire.

As Tarasthretenstien drew closer Opus bent on his knees in a gesture of surrender. Tarasthretenstien thought Opus was begging for his life, so she did not attack immediately. Seeing his deception working Opus struck the dragon with his magic Sword of OPSEC cleanly severing one of her five heads.

Fearing defeat Tarasthretenstein begged for her life explaining that she had hatchlings all over the world that would die if she did not feed them. Opus, realizing that leaving Tarasthretenstien alive would result in unacceptable risk cut off her four remaining heads.

As we all know today, Tarasthretenstien’s hatchlings survived leaving us with a world of threats and adversaries to this day.

When times get tough, remember the OPSEC God Opus and attack those threats in any way you can.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Puff The Magic Dragon by Peter, Paul and Mary

Posted in BS, History | Print | No Comments »

8. October 2009 by Revelator.

So I’m searching “OPSEC” on YouTube yesterday, as I am wont to do from time to time, and I ran across a new video titled “Atomic OPSEC Part 1.” I noticed that it was from the Department of Energy’s Nevada Site Office and I took this as a good sign. I liked what they did with their “OPSEC Hunters” video so I thought I would check it out.

Well, I gotta tell you this new video is even…

Ok, I can’t do this anymore. Let the BS end right here…

We made the video. That’s right; I wrote it and acted in it - my fellow DOG of OPSEC directed it and the new guy plays the scientist. We think it’s pretty good and think y’all might like it also so go to YouTube and search “Atomic OPSEC” and watch parts 1 and 2. Total time is around 13 minutes. We hope you like it.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Posted in BS, Awareness, WWW, Media, Movies | Print | 1 Comment »

25. September 2009 by Revelator.

A young John Cougar used those words as the title to his fifth album. In those moments when I’m frustrated by the sometimes low OPSEC give-a-crap-factor I wonder about those words and my mind drifts to this thought: OPSEC doesn’t matter and what if it did? Generally speaking it appears to me that no one really cares about OPSEC.

If OPSEC “mattered” then why is it so hard to get people who should care about OPSEC to actually care about OPSEC?
If OPSEC “mattered” then why is it blown off in the planning cycle?
If OPSEC “mattered” then why is it so often on the chopping block when money is tight?
Oh man, I could go on and on.

But to what end? What would be the point? No one cares. And I can’t even assume that those of you who are part-time/additional duty OPSEC POCs care. I’ve done too many OPSEC assessments and have seen with my own eyes the reality of dormant OPSEC programs around the world. I’ve done the interviews of unit personnel as they stare blankly at me when I ask them who their OPSEC Manager is or what a Critical Information List is. I’ve listened to blow-hard OPSEC POC’s who rant and rave about their OPSEC program only to find that it’s all an illusion - that nothing real exists. I’ve read Critical Information Lists that are 10 pages long and totally useless or were “benchmarked” from another unit and they didn’t even bother to change the letterhead to letterhead from their own unit. I’ve listened to OPSEC briefings that would make you want to rip your eyelids off. I’ve listened to senior leaders who talk, talk, talk, OPSEC but can’t seem to get an OPSEC section in their plans of operation. I’ve seen young just appointed OPSEC guys and gals who are ripping their hair out cuz the program they just took over sucks and they are getting no support to make it any better. And I’ve seen really good people try their damdest to do really good things and get shut down and hammered by idiots who make more money than they do.

Good Lord, why even bother? Seriously. Why bother? Hey - I’m not leading up to any great epiphany here. I’m not setting you up to tell you why you should bother. I have no intention of trying to get your emotions roiling by extolling the virtues of OPSEC and it’s devout practitioners in a vain attempt to get you psyched about how great OPSEC is. Nope. Not today.

Today I’m just bummed. OPSEC sucks - that seems to be the prevailing attitude so I’m just gonna give into it. Come on now…aside from some small pockets of success, in the vast majority of places that OPSEC should matter it simply doesn’t. And that sucks.

Keep the Faith! (your gonna need it)
Revelator

Nothing Matters And What If It Did - John Cougar

Posted in BS, General OPSEC | Print | 1 Comment »

3. September 2009 by Revelator.

I’ll never forget the night - I think we were in Lubbock or was it Wentzville…either way. I remember that Miles - that’s Miles Anthony, the lead singer of Big Slick, was really hot for this babe in the fourth row and as his top roadie he expected me to make the deal with her. You know - get her backstage and well…you know. And this was unusual because normally he would choose three or four just in case one or two wouldn’t well…you know. So I watched her off and on during the concert just to see what I could see. Well, I could see quite a lot if you know what I mean and I suspect that is what made Miles want her so bad but that’s neither here nor there.

I word or two about me is in order I suspect: My name is Night Train. Actually my name is Lance but a long time ago outside of a little bar called The Cavern a drunken Ringo called me Night Train and the moniker just stuck with me over the years. At that time I had spent three years in college and was doing a summer vacation with the love of my life who’s name I just can’t seem to recall at the moment. One night we went to see this band at a bar in the red light district called the Cavern and while I was hanging out after the show this chap in a leather jacket asked if I could help them drag some equipment to their van. Turns out that chap was John Lennon and we struck up a friendship that lasted until that fateful night outside of the Dakota. But that is the short version of how I started at a roadie. The story about why I am still a roadie is much longer and not quite as enjoyable.

So - back to that night in Barstow…or was it Philly - either way. During the drum solo (I swear Smokestack was channeling Don Brewer of Grand Funk that night) Miles asked if I hooked it up yet and I had to tell him not yet. Miles really didn’t like that answer but it was the only one I had right then. After a quick line and a towel-off he was back on stage and I was back to my job - pimpin for rock stars. Not a job I recommend to young professionals but I’m pretty good at it by now and I’m pretty damn sure that at sixty-six years of age I won’t be going to truck drivers school if this doesn’t work out. But this was 17 years ago when I still thought I would get a real job when I grew up.

Back to LuAnn (her name as I was to find out later)…She had squeezed her way up to the second row by now and had just flashed her considerable attributes to Miles and he looked at me and gave me the signal - again. Rock stars and their roadies have a complicated series of signals that would make a third base coach proud. One signal means “she can come back stage but that’s all” another means “she can come back stage if she brings her friend/sister” another means “she can come back stage but only if she’ll ___________ (insert desire here)” and yet another meant “she can come backstage but make sure she’s not a dude first.” There are more but I’m sure you get the gist of it. The signal I had just received for the second time meant “if she’s willing she can come on tour with us for a week or two.” I didn’t get that signal too often so I took it seriously.

And so I watched her. I watched her because there is a level of trust between a roadie and a horny rock star and I have a solid reputation for never letting the rock star down - or getting him arrested. And that’s the key to this whole operation - keep the rock star safe from a multitude of potentially embarrassing situations. And so I watched her. I watched her on her cell numerous times - and not that happy about it. I watched her turn away dude after dude who hit on her. I watched her as her older friend brought her beer after beer. And I noticed she didn’t have any tattoos.

And I watched as she walked away after Miles sang the last lines to their hit at the time, “Big Leg Woman” (a decent version of the classic Muddy Waters tune). As she walked I chased. I didn’t expect her to bolt so fast. I figured she would stick around and slide toward the side of the stage to well…you know. But she didn’t. She was in a hurry and I knew I would be fired if I didn’t get her backstage to Miles.

I was about to catch up to her when she met her angry mother and father at the exit. And that is when all the indicators started springing to my mind. No tat’s for one. Sure you can get your parents to sign for you if you are under 18 but not many do. And all the text messages and phone calls that she wasn’t happy about. No doubt her mom or dad had sent those. And all those dudes she turned away - no sense hooking up when your angry mom is gonna meet you at the door. And finally, it was her older friend that was bringing her the beers. Something someone under 18 couldn’t have purchased without a fake ID.

And so I had to face a not too happy Miles backstage. I just had to tell him she was underage and we were good. No way he wants to mess with any jailbait - not again, at least. In the end he hooked up with a reporter for a local rag that was much more age appropriate for my aging rock star. I am happy to report some 17 years later that they have been married for 15 years now and have two kids. The boy is named Thor and the girls name is LuAnn. I guess even if you’ve had as many as Miles you never quite forget the one that got away.

OPSEC - keeping rock stars out of jail for 60 years.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Jail Bait - George Thorogood and The Delaware Destroyers

Posted in Indicators, BS, Risk | Print | No Comments »

21. July 2009 by Revelator.

In yesterdays blog I listed a series of questions that I had hoped to have answered once I received my security clearance. I also stated that I didn’t ever get the answers to most of those. Well, it turns out that one of my faithful readers actually has the answers and is kind enough to share them with the rest of us. Because of the nature of the information and the sensitivity of the sources I cannot provide his/her name - suffice to say that he/she is known to many of you. Enjoy…

Revelator: Hope this helps…

Who really killed Kennedy?
- LBJ.

Did we land on the moon or was that all filmed in a soundstage in Burbank?
- We landed. Myth busters just proved it last night.

What is really going on in Area 51?
- It’s part of the current ‘Air Force Partying System’ - the Air Force had too many wild parties and broke the stereo systems in Areas 1 thru 50.

Is Elvis still alive?
- Yes he is. I just asked him.

Is there really a Hanger 18 and/or a Project Bluebook?
- Yes. It’s between Hangars 17 and 19. Yes. It was a joke. Or joke book.

Is there actually a government warehouse for freaky secret stuff? And if so, is the Arc of The Covenant there?
- Yes. It’s called the Pentagon. And no - God has more sense than to leave his scribbled down notes with a bunch of idiots.

Just who/what the hell is/are the Illuminati?
- Started out as a bunch of free-thinkers in Bavaria circa 1776. Recent Wanna-be’s took the name and supposedly comprise the New World Order…good luck to them.

Are we alone?
- No. If you need proof, just call 555-1212.

Who are the “Nine Unknown Men?”
- No one knows. That’s why we call them ‘Unknown’. But I think at least one’s named ‘Bob’.

Do the Grays really exist - and if they are running the world shouldn’t they be doing a better job of it?
- Yes they do. And yes, they should be; they need all the help they can get. Please call 8675…309. Ask for ‘Jenny’.

What the hell is going on in the Bermuda Triangle - and if it’s so jacked up there why do boats and planes still go there?
- Scientists determined that it’s a weather thing. A confluence of location and jet streams. Boats still go there because of what they saw on either the Adam’s Family movie or Unsolved Mysteries.

Where is Sasquatch and why do we never see more than one at a time?
- He resides at the Holladay Park Plaza, a Portland, Ore. assisted living center. You never see more than one at a time because he’s the only one. He’s classified as a cryptid.

Was that really a weather balloon in Roswell?
- Yes. But they were inadvertently popped by a gang of extra-terrestrials who were subsequently shot down and dismembered by some angry scientists who were really counting on getting that weather data.

What’s up with Stonehenge?
- A grouping of really big rocks which are the property of the English Crown and not the reigning monarch. It’s a place of burial; a domain of the dead.

And what about the Nazca Lines in Peru? Is this “Chariots of the Gods” stuff true?
- Just animal doodles on a large scale. A precursor to crop circles.
- Of course it’s true. It’s how we got Energizer batteries and keep our razor blades sharp.

And now you know…the rest of the story.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Posted in BS, Critical Information, General OPSEC | Print | No Comments »

20. January 2009 by Layne.

“Will that be all for you today sir?”
“Yeah, that’ll do it.”
“And what is your phone number sir?”
“I don’t have one.”
“Your cell, your house, wife’s cell - which ever you prefer sir. Any one will do.”
“I prefer not to give you my phone number.”
“Fine. Can I just have your email address then?”
“No.”
“No, you don’t have one or no, you won’t give it to me.”
“That’s right.”
“Well which is it sir? Do you have an email address?”
“Yes. I have three actually.”
“Then which would you like to give me today sir?”
“Pardon me?”
“Which of your three email addresses would you like to give me sir?”
“How about none of them. Does that work for you?”
“Fine. Whatever. Your home address will do for our records.”
“Ok, go with that then.”
“Well, I need you to give that to me sir.”
“Give what to you?”
“Your home address sir.”
“You need my home address?”
“Yeah.”
“For the purchase of four triple-A batteries I am required to provide you with my home address?”
“Or a phone number, or email address. As I said, whichever you prefer.”
“As I said, I prefer none of the above.”
“Sir, you’re holding up the line.”
“That’s ok, I’m in no hurry.”

I’ve been through this little dance of denial more times than I care to remember and I’m getting damn tired of it. And even though I’m an OPSEC guy it’s not all about the information. I’m pretty confident that my home phone, cell phone, email address and home address are readily available to anyone with a reasonable understanding of how to find these things so I’m not full-on trying to protect this info.

No, the real reason is I resent that when stores request this information they try to hide the fact that the personal information they collect is going straight to the marketing department. Also, that they act like this is part of the sales process - that I must give them the information as part of the sale. Notice that they always request this information during, and not after, the transaction. And more and more people are just giving in and providing whatever information is requested by the 22 year old running the register.

Me? I pay with cash and deny all requests for information. Mostly, I just like the unbelieving look on thier faces when I say no but also I wonder what information they’ll want next. Phone, address, email seems innocent enough but now that we are used to providing this info without much thought - what will they want next year? Or five years from now?

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Shop Around - Smokey Robinson and the Miracles

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5. December 2008 by Revelator.

Regular readers of this blog may remember that I went on quite a rant some time ago about what some are passing off as fortune cookies. You know the ones; you open it and the words inside are not a fortune but some lame quote or some inisight about you, the cookie eater.

Well - here’s the latest “fortune” I recieved: “You have a flair for adding a fanciful dimension to any story.”

Ladies and gentlemen this is NOT a fortune - it’s a statement! And not even a true statement. Reread it and I’ll explain: “You have a flair for adding a faciful dimension to any story.” Did you get it that time? No? Well then allow me to put this into plain english for you - “You are a liar.” That is what this “fortune” told me…I am a liar. I mean, what else would you call someone who has the ability to add fanciful dimensions to a story? That’s right - you call that person a liar.

So not only did I not get a fortune from my fortune cookie (again) the damn thing called me a liar. At least it said I have a “flair” for it so presumably I’m a good liar - so I got that going for me…which is nice.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

Voodoo Child (Slight Return) - Jimi Hendrix

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17. November 2008 by Revelator.

A lesson in indicators…

A man was shopping at his local supermarket where he selected one half-gallon of 2% milk, one carton of eggs, on quart of orange juice, one head of romaine lettuce, a small can of coffee, a package of bacon, a box of Band Aids and a bottle of unscented lotion.

As he was placing his items on the conveyor for check-out a beautiful woman standing behind him watched as he placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up his purchases, the woman calmly stated matter-of-factly, “You must be single.”

The man was a bit startled by her rather bold (yet correct) statement but he was also intrigued by the woman’s keen intuition and (with any luck) interest in him. So he smiled at her and then looked at the items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about his selections that could have given away his single status to this increasingly hot woman.

At this point curiosity (and lust if truth be told) got the better of him and he said: “Well, you know what? You are absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that I was single?
The woman replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

So, what is the lesson here?
Simple - beautiful women do not pick up single 40-ish men in the supermarket.

But what is the OPSEC lesson here?
There isn’t one. Sometimes life just sucks.

Keep the Faith!
Revelator

“No Woman, No Cry” - Bob Marley and the Wailers

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25. August 2008 by Revelator.

Here’s a random non-OPSEC thought: Do you think millions of twenty-something Chinese people are running around with American symbols/letters on their arms, necks and the small of their backs? Do you think their friends are coming up and asking; “Dude, is that American or what? What does that mean? Is that the symbol for luck or wisdom? Man, that is soooo cool.”

Somehow I don’t think so. And by the way, none of the Americans I see with these Chinese symbols/letters tattoo’ed into their skin look remotely Chinese. So I must confess, I don’t get it. But then I’m old. I think if I wanted to convey to people that I am honest, or lucky, or blessed with great wisdom then I would use the English language to convey this thought so that no one would ever have to ask me what that damn thing on my arm means.

By the way - I have six tat’s myself so I’m not picking on those who chose to get inked - I’m just saying.

Keep the Faith,
Revelator

China Girl - David Bowie

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13. June 2008 by Revelator.

     A number of you have emailed me asking what is up with the entry titles so I figured I would explain.  For no real reason what-so-ever I began using song titles as titles for my entries.  The problem (apparently) is that not all readers know who performed the songs and I keep getting emails asking about the artist so I decided I would take some time and fill you in on the past artists starting with the title on this entry and working backward.  In the future I will include the artists name at the end of the entry for you curious few out there.

What’s Going On - Marvin Gaye

The Message - Grandmaster Flash and The Furious Five

Hot For Teacher - Van Halen

Welcome To The Jungle - Guns and Roses

You Can’t Always Get What You Want - Rolling Stones

Friends In Low Places - Garth Brooks

Purple Rain - Prince

Tumbling Dice - Rolling Stones

Thunder Road - Bruce Springsteen and The E Street Band

Reveloution #9 - Beatles

Here Comes The Sun - Beatles

Keep the Faith!

Revelator

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22. January 2008 by Revelator.

In our world the OPSEC chaos theory describes the behavior of certain nonlinear dynamical risk analysis systems that may exhibit dynamics that are highly sensitive to initial conditions (popularly referred to as the butterfly effect). As a result of this sensitivity, which manifests itself as an exponential growth of perturbations in the initial risk conditions, the behavior of chaotic OPSEC systems appears to be random. This happens even though these systems are deterministic, meaning that their future dynamics are fully defined by their initial vulnerability conditions, with no random elements involved. This behavior is known as deterministic OPSEC chaos, or simply OPSEC chaos.

Chaotic behavior has been observed in the laboratory in a variety of systems including intelligence collection, oscillating chemical reactions, logistical black holes, administrative SNAFU’s, fluid dynamics, operations planning, and mechanical/magneto-mechanical devices. Observations of chaotic OPSEC behavior on the battlefield include the dynamics of unencrypted satellite comms in the solar system, the time evolution of the magnetic field of adversarial bodies, radical population growth in ecology, the dynamics of the threat potentials in neurons, and molecular vibrations. Everyday examples of chaotic OPSEC conditions include the OPSEC Coordinators meeting, the OPSEC Staff Assistance Meeting, and the “Sprinkle some OPSEC on this plan” verbal order.

Systems that exhibit mathematical OPSEC chaos are deterministic and thus orderly in some sense; this technical use of the term OPSEC chaos is at odds with common parlance, which suggests complete disorder. A related field of physics called quantum OPSEC chaos theory studies systems that follow the laws of quantum risk mechanics. Recently, another field, called relativistic vulnerability chaos, has emerged to describe systems that follow the laws of general vulnerability relativity.

As well as being orderly in the sense of being deterministic, chaotic OPSEC systems usually have ill defined statistics. And this is why no one will protect items on your Critical Information List, everyone will say exactly what they aren’t supposed to say when out on the town and everyone will whine when you mention that it is time for their OPSEC brief. OPSEC Chaos – ain’t it a bitch.

Keep the Faith!

Revelator

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